“Me too. It wasn’t great but... it was home,” I said with a bit of a wistful smile. Hearing her say that reminded me of the night I lost it. The night I broke my back and needed to become the Winter Knight. My back had long since healed. I still faked that I needed Mab’s magic but that wasn’t why I was still the Winter Knight. Sure someone might mess with Harry Dresden’s daughter if he was a Warden. That would go poorly. But the sort of vengeance I could potentially bring as the Winter Knight was a stronger deterrent. Only Mab could hold Maggie over my head and she knew better. Still, the time to hang up the Mantle was probably getting close. It was harder and harder to push away those urges and the scary thing is that I was growing tired of doing it.
Yes, I know that becoming evil was bad but it was just so exhausting fighting it all the time. The worst part is that sometimes I found myself thinking “but what if I gave in just a little? I could still be good and I wouldn’t have to fight so much.” The moment I gave into a “what if” I’ve lost the fight. And that isn’t a fight I’m going to lose.
“This place isn’t bad though,” I said, pushing those thoughts away as I smiled at Maggie and unlocked the door. Inside the house wasn’t all that big. Actually smaller than most of the other ones in the area but I didn’t need much. Really, the only weird thing about it was the number of skulls placed in it. There was one in each room and as soon as I brought Bonnie out of my pocket her form wooshed from the skull in my pocket to the nearest one.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2018-03-14 02:30 am (UTC)“Me too. It wasn’t great but... it was home,” I said with a bit of a wistful smile. Hearing her say that reminded me of the night I lost it. The night I broke my back and needed to become the Winter Knight. My back had long since healed. I still faked that I needed Mab’s magic but that wasn’t why I was still the Winter Knight. Sure someone might mess with Harry Dresden’s daughter if he was a Warden. That would go poorly. But the sort of vengeance I could potentially bring as the Winter Knight was a stronger deterrent. Only Mab could hold Maggie over my head and she knew better. Still, the time to hang up the Mantle was probably getting close. It was harder and harder to push away those urges and the scary thing is that I was growing tired of doing it.
Yes, I know that becoming evil was bad but it was just so exhausting fighting it all the time. The worst part is that sometimes I found myself thinking “but what if I gave in just a little? I could still be good and I wouldn’t have to fight so much.” The moment I gave into a “what if” I’ve lost the fight. And that isn’t a fight I’m going to lose.
“This place isn’t bad though,” I said, pushing those thoughts away as I smiled at Maggie and unlocked the door. Inside the house wasn’t all that big. Actually smaller than most of the other ones in the area but I didn’t need much. Really, the only weird thing about it was the number of skulls placed in it. There was one in each room and as soon as I brought Bonnie out of my pocket her form wooshed from the skull in my pocket to the nearest one.
“Need anything to drink?”